The Meat Pie Blog

Back a winner

2007-04-04T17:13:00.000+10:00

A hot tip for all those punters reading The Meat Pie blog.

Next time you take an interest in horse racing, put something on this:

'He's No Pie Eater'
Trainer: Graeme Rogerson
Jockey: Hugh Bowman

Sure thing.

Introducing...pie trading cards

2007-03-20T16:38:00.000+11:00

Set to sweep Asia, the Meat Pie blog can give you an exclusive preview of the first prints of the cards set to drive schoolkids wild:

Tastless pie naming?

2007-02-07T14:40:00.000+11:00

According to the Metro in the UK A pub restaurant in the UK is under pressure to withdraw the name of a faggot pie -- using UK TV presenter Michael Barrymore's name.

Peter Towler who runs the pie factory has been under fire for offering a "Barrymore Pie" containing locally-made faggots "swimming in onion gravy".

The pub has responded by accusing those calling for the pie to be withdrawn of lacking a sense of humour.

"Under no circumstances are we trying to be offensive to anyone - it's all about having a laugh," Towler said.

Thoughts ploggers?

Pie review: Cheese and Bacon Tiger

2006-12-20T14:02:00.000+11:00

Vendor: Harry's Cafe de Wheels
Price: $4.95
Sauce: Not chosen
Pastry: 8
Filling: 9
Overall Tastyness: 8.8
Overall rating: 8.9
Value rating: 7.9

Let it be known, the plogging community has expanded its frontiers. Recently the community of ploggers moved on to explore the CBD, leaving the crack whore residents of Pyrmont behind them.

On an overcast day this week, a group of stalwart and n00b ploggers ventured down to Harry's cafe de Wheels to share in a communal pie-eating experience.

While Harry's has a plentiful menu of pies, hot dogs, desserts and drinks, the Cheese and Bacon Tiger proved the most popular delicacy of choice.

As with most of Harry's pies, the Cheese and Bacon Tiger is topped with a mash of potato and peas. After getting through this, I progressed to the pie proper.

Firstly, I must commend Harry's on the temperature of the Tiger. Pies should be hot, but not enough to burn your tongue. The temperature of the Tiger perfectly met these expectations.

Inside the pie, the gravy flowed without large chunks of meat. This was fine, although the absence of cheese in the Tiger was astutely observed by one n00b plogger.

The gravy and pie insides also had a certain amount of 'kick' to them that meant this pie will not be forgotten in a hurry. Bland gravy often condemns a pie to a forgettable life, but the Tiger was not guilty of this crime.
The sting in the tail of this Tiger is obviously testament to the good name Harrys has earned.

All in all, the Tiger was a fine pie-eating experience, and I assure readers your humble ploggers will return again to Harrys to sample more of his delights.

The only other point I observe in this plog is the price of the Tiger, $4.95 is expensive for any pie.

Return of vendor pie season

2006-12-07T15:13:00.000+11:00

Out gracing others with my pie-wise presence last night, I was pleasantly surprised to be offered a pie in the company of yet another vendor.

The welcome presence of pies at vendor functions has been previously discussed on this plog, and I was happy...alright...overjoyed to see the trend continuing last night - in a movie theatre too, of all places.

Let it be said to that in the middle of a vendor party, the humble party pie does not last long. These were seized on without much ado, and devoured quickly.

Vendor pie-eating community, welcome back.

No pies on offer for Thorpie

2006-11-28T09:29:00.000+11:00

Ian Thorpe's shock retirement from elite swimming has been a shock to many in Australia. It seems the lure of gold medals ain't enough for the designer pants clad world champ.

Publicly it seems the world record holder was lacking motivation. However, sauces close to the champ say the reason for quitting was that there wasn't a good enough offer from the local pastry industry to keep the fire going.

That's right, Thorpie loves his pies. He might not publicly admit it but everyone knows he's a closet steak and mushroom pie man.

According to sauces Thorpe was expecting a similar offer to UK boxing star, Ricky Hatton, who according to the Blackburn Citizen has been offered a lifetime supply of East Lancashire pies for winning his next bout for the IBF light-welterweight title.

No doubt, a victory next January for the undefeated boxer will taste even better with the pastry offer on the table.

As a pie loving nation where were the Mrs. Macs or Big Bens or Four and Twenty pie barons in Australia to offer the same for our Thorpie? At 24 the 5 time Gold medalist and current world record holder couldn't secure the pastry payment he was after.

You heard it here first. Stay tuned for more coverage on this breaking news.

Patties makes a charge

2006-11-07T10:22:00.000+11:00

Being renown for my passion for finance and the sharemarket, I thought I'd congratulate Patties Foods on a successful stockmarket listing this week.

Patties makes Four 'N Twenty, Patties Pies, Herbert Adams and Nanna's pies, and basically is the only hope I can see upsetting the pie landscape currently dominated by Mrs Mac.

I was interested to read Patties' owner Richard Rijs comments on new markets.

Mr Rijs said Patties was interested in any area of frozen savoury snacks and frozen desserts. "We don't really want to get outside of that area, but it does encompass a really large food category," he said.

This guy is onto something. I can see dessert pies really taking off.

Redefining the pie

2006-10-06T13:55:00.000+10:00

Pies made national headlines this week, and I couldn't let the incident pass without comment.

Many would have heard TV and radio reports this week that a pie manufacturer has called for a tightening of the definition of a meat pie. Namely, the company wants the pie definition, as defined by the Australia and New Zealand Food Authority, to stipulate that a meat pie contains 'real meat'. They want a defintion of 'real meat' to be included, this being that meat constitutes flesh attached to a bone.

Who is the company behind this controversial push that threatens to de-stabilise the existence of the pie as we know it? It's none other than Mrs Macs, throwing her weight around again.

Mrs Macs' rationale is a tighter definition would prevent public concerns that other parts of animal carcasses are sometimes included in pies.

It's imperative ploggers, and you plog readers, voice your opinion of this controversial move by posting a comment. For what fun is the pie-eating experience if you can't bite into a pie uncertain of what you're actually eating?

Pie bashing

2006-10-03T12:18:00.000+10:00

From the weekend comes this tragic tale of a good pie samaritan.

A TV news bulletin said a man met a couple of strangers one of these past nights in Matraville, and obviously sharing his passion for pies, he proceeded to purchase a couple of delicacies for his new-found friends. Can't find the story online.

Shortly after this act of goodwill, they bashed him, and stole his wallet.

This act of abhorrence astounds me. In the name of the pie father, I cast away any link between pies and violence.

Police apparently are still searching for these pie-eating scum.

The lesson for us ploggers here? Beware of strangers craving pie.

A pie what?

2006-09-12T09:09:00.000+10:00

A long, long time ago during my school loan consolidation era, before my college loan consolidation I got myself a car insurance quote. Yes this was before my love of pies. Auto car insurance quotes were through the roof! Not to mention my student loan consolidation rates that were getting sold to structure my selltement and sell annuity to my federal student loan consolidation. Auto quotes, insurance quotes, and student loan consolidation interest rates were seriously affecting my ability to afford pies. Real meat pies, dammit! Who were these people in san diego dui attorneys to stop me from eating my pie?

I can understand high car insurance rates, and structured settlement with the one you love but student loans and consolidation of student loans is udderly pathetic! What I needed was student loan refinance so I could afford the pie, endulge in the pie, rub my greedy face between the goodness of the pastry again. Luckily my citibank student loan consolidation that I looked at was quite interesting. Maybe I'll consider it, maybe I won't. I also might have a look at a private student loan consolidation to cure my dire situation.

And then somebody said "lasik new york". Whoah! slow down egg head my private loan consolidation, my teleconference services and the art institute of seattle were really gunning for my newfound wealth. With no bad credit equity loan to my name and no houston criminal attorney on my arse the orlando culunary institute would be proud of my student loan consolidation program. my friend ditech, the bastard, wouldn't let go of the situation about the auto quote. He reckoned he could find a better deal, thus projecting my guttony in all things pastry.

I daren't know what to do with all this whoring of adsense in the name of pie.

Hannah's expanding range

2006-08-02T11:58:00.000+10:00

Hannah's Pies in Ultimo is apparently expanding its range to include organic curries, etc. The article was in the Good Living section in the SMH yesterday, can't seem to find it online though. Maybe pie sales have dropped off??

Where are all the pies?

2006-08-01T13:47:00.000+10:00

It seems we've not had as many posts as before on the pie blog.

Where art thou ploggers?

Pies from the fatherland

2006-06-28T16:59:00.000+10:00

Was recently exploring southwest germany as part of the great World Cup fiasco.

I think i ate a pie. it was kind of baked looking and meatish.

I definitely ate a pretzel, a wurst--infact lots of wurst, infact lots of wurst and lots of pretzel, and beer.. lots of beer.

Pies however were scarce - i think it was a strategy to unbalance the travelling aussie supporters who would have simply felt far too at home amidst all that beer and wurst...
so much the wurst... so much beer...

sigh. god bless the krauts.

Monday is pie day

2006-06-05T12:48:00.000+10:00

The posts to this blog may have been less frequent of late, but don't question the commitment of some pioneers.

As the rain poured down on a cold Monday morning, pida had the perfect idea to offer his services as a pie cart for the company for lunch.

Ever the pie evangelist, he wandered around the company taking orders, and eventually drove out to Hannah's (see previous postings) to order 18 pies. Yes, 18 pies. I kid you not.

This tallied around $52, covering vegetarian, cheese and bacon, curry, plain, potato. Previous pie-shunners could be seen tucking into their respective pastry delight with gay abandon. It was pie-o-clock, and not a cross-word about pies was spoken. This was a communal pie-eating experience to be savoured.

Pies have again saved the say, and I think them a useful HR exercise.

Hannah's meanwhile will forever be recalling the day a man hellbent on pies came forth with an order for what was probably their most profitable day in history.

NY pies

2006-05-11T15:24:00.000+10:00

Piefriends,

Today, courtesy of my New York-dwelling mother (Mother Impiety), an establishment known as The Tuck Shop was brought to my attention. This dining establishment, located on the Lower East Side, bills itself as an Australian diner specialising in the baked goods we profess a passion for.

Apparently, however, the entire operation is staffed by Mexicans who are not privy to the art of baking an Australian Meat Pie. To wit, a YIMversation with Mother Impiety:

Impiety: Was it any good?
Impiety: What kind of food?
MotherImpiety: The meat pies didn't taste anyfing like Aussie meat pies.....they were too good.

A review of the establishment may be found here.

I am interested in Pietastic's reaction, given his American meat pie experiences.

Choice ponders the pie definition

2006-05-09T15:33:00.000+10:00

Two related articles call for a rare-double post today.

One by SMH
and the initial tests by Choice (bro).

Choice mag tested three top brand pies, and found meat was less than 30% of the pie.

There is simply too much in these reports to analyse at once, so I will be posting on the implications of these reports over time.

The most interesting excerpt from the SMH story:

"Our analyst found bits of lung tissue in three brands, while about half had obvious gristle in the filling," he said.

But a spokeswoman for Food Standards, Lydia Buchtmann, said the presence of gristle was not necessarily an indication there might be a camel's snout in your pie. And she defended the current pie standards.

"Obviously we can't legislate for quality," she said. "Our advice is look at the price, or go for a pie that's specifically labelled steak or chicken. Or make your own."

However, according to Choice's analysis, the fourth most expensive pie tested (at $3.20) had just 23 per cent meat, while another pie available from the supermarket chain Aldi, which sold for just 55 cents, had 32 per cent meat content.

It's great to see pie standards being debated so vigorously.

However, I have some initial points to raise:

1) It's great to see pie makers varying their ingredients and keeping us on our toes.

2) "Obviously we can't legislate for quality" - reminds me of the old value ain't quality debate between Gomer and I. Clearly Buchtmann sides with me here.

3) FSA seem to be implying that chicken and steak pies are better?

4) This survey is piss-weak. Our pie reviews are much more comprehensive. There's a much-needed place for this site in society.

5) Why are we waiting to hold a pie-eating contest when we can get 55 cent pies from Aldi????!!!

Pieface franchising

2006-05-09T15:20:00.000+10:00

The ever-observant Impiety recently brought to my attention an advertisement in a prominent metropolitan daily concerning franchising opportunities for Pie Face.

Apparently, Pie Face is "an iconic brand with a strong network growth plan for Australia".

"We make all pies from scratch and deliver them daily to our "pie dealers" (franchisees) to bake fresh for our "pie addicts" (customers)."

This puts a nice new spin on the pie eating relationship. I now consider myself a junkie, and some of the shops round Pyrmont injecting rooms.

I confess to not having heard of Pie Face, but I will watch in suspense as it mounts a McDonalds-like charge.

Are any ploggers interested in going into business?

If so, contact details are: wayne@pieface.biz and 041 1100 489.

PS. Unrelated, I would also like to note a recent observation of a place called Pieman Heads in Tasmania.

The pie card

2006-04-24T15:36:00.000+10:00

Kudos to Pida, he recently discovered an innovation in the pie-o-sphere very worthy of ploggers' attention. Francois' have introduced the pie card. Observe:

Apologies for image quality, but it says:

"Collect one stamp per pie each time you visit us and we will reward you with a FREE pie of your choice when you have collected ten stamps."

As you can see then, this is not unlike the Subway Sub-club.

Pida, ever the trooper, already has several stamps on his card.

Although I may've taken Francois' to task in my pie review, I do think encouraging pie consumption is admirable, and a socially responsible act. Francois' should be congratulated on being a good corporate citizen.

Mind you, any pie-eater who gets his/her eleventh pie from Francois' for free is well deserving of it when they charge almost $5 per pie.

Pie review: high-brow lamb & rosemary

2006-04-24T13:46:00.000+10:00

Vendor: Francois' Pastries, Pyrmont
Style: Lamb & rosemary
Price: $4.80
Sauce: Not chosen, but 30c
Pastry: 6
Filling: 7
Overall tastyness: 6.6
Overall rating: 6.12
Value rating: 1.17

One Monday at midday, Pida led a group of hardcore pie-lovers to another of his local pie-eating haunts: Francois' Pastries. This upmarket patisserie has gained some attention amongst ploggers of late due to its introduction of the pie card (see following blog on this).

It must be said of Francois' up front that this is not your standard pie-eating environment. No wife-beating singlet wearers or tradesmen here. This is strictly for the high-brow crowd, and my lamb and rosemary pie was served in a special white dish, along with a knife and fork (often taboo among pie-eaters).

I dug in. My first impressions of the pastry was that it was not tender. Yes, it looked fine on the outside, but once it cracked, I found it had no soul. What is pie pastry without soul, I ask you? I immediately wondered how long it had been sitting on its shelf.

As I delved further into the pie, I could not help but be suprised by the size of the lamb and rosemary chunks. As I have made clear in previous pie reviews, I am all for small, indefinable grains of meat. This pie did not oblige. The chunks of lamb were quite possibly the largest I have ever experienced in a pie. Not only did this stagnate the pie-eating experience, but I felt I consumed the pie much quicker than others. The pie was broken down into nothing more than a series of bites.

Hence, this pie-eating occassion seemed to evaporate rapidly. Not helping the situation was a lack of sting, or bite, in the flavour of the pie. Indeed I didn't even feel as though there was much gravy inside. It all seemed too solid.

As I observed to Pida, I also presume the size of the pies at Francois' may be smaller than the average pie fare (though marginally).

I present this review to the plogging community then as another example that when it comes to pies, appearances can be deceiving. There is always more than meats the pie. Francois' may intimidate the average pie-eater due to its high-pie-society look and feel, but never fear, it doesn't surpass the traditional pie.

At least not in the lamb pies department.

Compelling reading

2006-04-17T19:31:00.000+10:00

I have stumbled across the greatest article ever written.

Any plogger worth his/her sauce will commit every detail here to memory. It even includes mention of Gomer's treasured pie-floater.

Journalism at its very finest.

Adrift in a green sea...

2006-04-11T10:32:00.000+10:00

Its important not to brush over this, so I have addressed this issue from a number of angles.

Part A – A brief history.
A little known fact is that I hail from the quieter realms—South Australia, and to be exact, the foothills of Adelaide. Another fact I've kept hidden is the passion for pastries, and pies in particular that originates from my homelands. Back in the days of settlers and all that strudel, there were large contingents of immigrants arriving from Western Europe. The Germans got the wine bits going, and the Cornish got their paws into the copper and tin mines dotted around the place. They also established a fair portion of the bakeries of the area, and in Adelaide, a bakery is still predominantly a savoury place, cakes and sweets are peripheral to the extensive ranges pies, pasties, and sausage rolls. Bakeries remain a distinguishing feature of Adelaide. Adelaide is not a terribly thin place. But it is important to acknowledge the history and culture that is baked right in to every pie.

Part B – exert from Wikipedia
A pie floater is a meal served at pie carts in Adelaide and elsewhere in South Australia. It is also eaten in a wide range of northern counties in the UK. It was once more widely available in other parts of Australia but its popularity waned. It consists of the traditional Australian meat pie covered with tomato sauce (similar to ketchup), sitting, usually inverted, in a plate of thick green pea soup.
Though the dish does not look particularly appetizing, some proponents report that it is flavoursome and quite filling. Joe Cocker reportedly had a pie floater sent to his dressing room when singing in Adelaide.In 2003, the pie floater was recognised as a South Australian Heritage Icon by the National Trust of Australia. Whilst other food such as yiros are increasing their share of the late-night snack market in Adelaide, the pie floater remains a popular snack choice for young residents after a night out.
The Pie Floater also makes an appearance in the reality-mirroring (albeit a funhouse mirror) Discworld novel The Last Continent by Terry Pratchett. In the story, it represents the only national dish in the entire world that is actually edible and in any way enjoyable.

Part C – An Example.
No one in Adelaide actually knows where they come from – but they are bloody huge – we’re not talking caravan at the football – we’re talking a big travelling kitchen. The Pie carts only come out at night. There are a couple of them, and they park in strategically odd places around Adelaide – not particularly near any sort of nightlife or anything really. They just are there, and if you pass that way in the daytime.. they are not…. Its just one of those things. You learn not to question it, and instead to just value your good luck to be standing outside one.
You are of course also drunk. Its virtually impossible to find one when your sober – I tried once…and it vanished – it actually did, they tow it away somewhere – must to be to keep the mystery in it. And you must have either caught a taxi to get to it, or at least stumbled a good few city blocks, so you must be hungry… hungry for the good stuff yeah - you big lush!
They do have a few stools, but its better to eat standing up – you need to be careful not to spill it on yourself. You can also get takeaway, but why ruin a perfectly charming moment. The fluorescent lighting is romantic sometimes. And you will never eat alone – it‘s bizarre to think that your standing in some odd street, but other fools just like you are stumbling up demanding a floater to take the edge off.
It comes in a big old Perspex dish, a lump of pie and pea soup slopped around it. The trick is (as always) to get the right proportion or sauce on it – experienced eaters just go for lots.
Its not a fast meal, so can take your time and enjoy the atmosphere, observe the strange folk that are joining you at this time of night, or just chew the fat – quite literally – it is a pie after all.
It is even said that there have been several marriages directly attributed to a night at the pie cart – and even more babies. Forget chocolate or oysters.
It is without question a striking experience, the colours, the oddity, the mystery and the magic – all to vanish at some early hour, and all that will remain to prove it ever happened is the greeny brown muck dried on your shirt.

Calling all lurking ploggers

2006-04-10T12:34:00.000+10:00

Some time ago now us ploggers took the dicey step of allowing comments on this site to be posted by the wider pie community.

Since then we have plogged thoughtfully and frequently, no doubt giving you much amusement.

I am confident we have garnered a much wider sphere of readership than just our local pie-community, and hereby throw it open to you, the pie-eaters of afar, to show yourselves on this site.

Please pie readers, wherever you are, come forth and give us some feedback via the Comment button below.

We know you are out there.

Pie review: The Pot Pie

2006-03-27T16:39:00.000+11:00

Brand and vendor: Murphey's special of the day, made fresh from the kitchen
Style: Pot
Price: $7.50 with Salad. (+ 15% of overall bill for gratuity)
Pastry: 7
Filling: 9.5
Overall tastyness: 9
Sauce: Did not want to ruin pie with Ketchup, but was optional
Overall rating: 9
Value ratio: 8

---

Editor's note:
Is this a case of apple's vs oranges? The pot pie is defenitely a pastry item not to be missed but with not much to compare it to in Australia I fear this review will not give the right frame for this wall of the web. However, I digress.

---
Strolling through the urban bohemia of San Francisco myself and another pietastic.blogspot.com fan found ourselves running into a pub to quench our thirst. Being past noon, the Irish pub was serving lunch. This, my heart diseased friends, is where I found her.

"Today's Special: Homemade Pot Pie" said the fetching bar keep.

"Sold!" said me in an overly keen way that I think startled everyone.

15 minutes and half a pint later the pot pie was delivered. It was beautifully presented in gourmet fashion with a (free) salad? A worthy note to all Australian pie makers: a little roughage goes a lot further in my books than spuds in a pool of gravvy. While the pie looked similar to those of the Australian variety it did have one notable difference....there was no pastry top. This lead me to believe that this species of pie was not to be fingered and a knife and fork were the appropriate dining utensil for consumption.

The middle of the pie was a mixture of mince and real bits of meat. Unfortunately I cannot remember exactly what type of meat, but it was tasty. Also in the pie was some sort of bread crumb mix....and in my books a winner. What was missing from the down under version of the meat pie was gravvy. Not gravvy was recognised in the pie and everything tasted extremely fresh....like the magical pie animal was only just slaughtered for my consumption.

Maybe my review of pies is a little slanted as this was the first taste of pastry in a few months but this was the tastiest thing we'd tasted since Harry's pie tiger (has anyone reviewed that yet?).

But overall it seems the yanks do know how to make a good pie and well worth the trip over the pacific. A country that makes a good pie is okay by me and together we should protect our way of life against those who don't respect our right to getting high on pie. While a little on the expensive side (Conversion=10 dollars) you can't, as the Mr Mcartney sung, buy me love.

Does Macau live the pie life?

2006-03-27T09:33:00.000+11:00

Not from what I saw in my brief visit there last week. Admittedly I did not go scouring the island for pies, but I did not stumble across any in my journeying. Plenty of meat, plenty of rice, but no sign of pies.

So I'd like to throw it out to all those Macauean readers of 'The Empier chews back', and I know there are many of you, are you a pie-loving country or not?

I wait for your reply with baited breath.

Another country crossed off the pie-inspection list, folks.

Hey pie-eater!

2006-03-20T17:15:00.000+11:00

Refereeing the world game on the weekend, I encountered the term 'pie-eater' being used in a most bizarre fashion.

As the assistant referee in one match (linesman in the old lingo), I heard the coach behind me refer to a 'pie-eater'. Instantly I was impressed! Here was a man who obviously recognised he was in the presence of a great pie-eater.

But imagine my disgust when I realised he was referring not to me, but to the referee in the centre of the pitch. And it wasn't a term of endearment.

"He looks like he's eaten a few pies," he said, unhappy at the decisions being made.

I was upset by this act of betrayal of the 'pie-eater' terminology. A pie-eater is not a tag to insult others with, it is one of the highest accolades to which you can bestow on an individual.

To that coach, I hope you burn your tongue on your next pie.

Pie review: Seafood pie

2006-03-10T13:36:00.000+11:00

Brand and vendor: Hannah's
Style: Seafood
Price: $3.90
Pastry: 8
Filling: 8
Overall tastyness: 7
Sauce: N/A
Overall rating: 7.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
Value ratio: 2.2

A lunchtime sojourn to Hannah's saw me consume what may have been my maiden seafood pie. And an impressive young damsel she was.

The pastry was thin, but not flaky, which I approved of, as flaky pastry can litter your pie-eating experience.

Although I was well aware I was eating a seafood pie, the sight of seafood inside the hallowed pastry walls still surprised me. What's more, this was covered by some sort of yellow creme, clearly distinguishing this pie from all those who had gone before.

Inside, there was fish, tuna, and - surprise, surprise - even a couple of prawns. This lucious assortment of ocean delicacies provided a varied consumption experience. It even made me feel as though I was eating something that was healthy, which cannot usually be said for pies. Female ploggers, take note of this. I think this a point worthy of future discussion.

In summary, I wish to point out the one inherent weakness of the seafood pie. As its contents are not suited to being greatly heated, it doesn't leave a lasting impression. Such ingredients don't serve to give any 'kick' in the taste, which I've always enjoyed in a stingingly hot beef pie or a flavoursome steak pie. Thus it seemed I moved on from this unique pastry without so much as a parting kiss from her.

Still, sure to be an inclusion in my upcoming autobiography, 'Pies I have loved'.

Shoutout to a far-flung pie-o-neer

2006-03-09T16:52:00.000+11:00

Amidst a noticeable lull in pie proceedings, I consider this an opportune moment to send a public communique to our far-flung pie-o-neer, pietastic.

Pietastic, before you quietly slipped off on your sinister travels, we challenged you to report back on the livelihood of pie-eaters afar.

To bastardise a common saying, plenty of sauce has now passed under the pie, and we'd be chuffed if you could present your interim findings. A progress report, if you will.

Take it away, pietastic.

Does pieman deserve his URL?

2006-03-09T14:39:00.000+11:00

So, I was looking around the Web and came across www.pieman.org. Now, one would assume this URL would be pointing to a pie-related organisation. A not-for-profit organisation. Instead it is a Web site for some hippy stoner crap -- all of which I can tell is illegal in America (or Amerikkka as they say on pieman.org). So who is this man who hordes the sacred URL of pieman.org?

To quote:

"i am a 60s hippie who is in fighting the good fight against nazi scum, george bush, marijuana laws and the police state. i relate to acid folk rock which is akin to the likes of the jefferson airplane, byrds, bob dylan, grateful dead, quicksilver messenger service, david peel and the lower east side, dharma bums, crosby stills and nash, buffalo springfield. i used to organize the griffith park love-ins back in los angeles"

Well, well, well I never knew the "good fight" involved listening to such shitty bands. Fuck you Pieman. I don't like his advocation of pot. Again from the pie man's pie hole:

"i resent the police state that is being inflicted upon us by bush and his cronies especially the anti-medical marijuana court decision. now the time has come for all to come together to fight FOR peace and justice!!!"

Fuck you pie man dot org. You fucking dope fiend hording a perfectly cool URL to promote illegal drug use. Not only that, the design of the site is horrible and breaks just about every law for designing Web sites. Like all hippy, tie-dye freaks the owner is little more than a bum who is using this url to BUSK! How obcene! Is this .org (non profit organisation URL for this Web site) going toward the illegal cultivation and distribution of drugs to the children of our society? Again, from the pie man pie hole:

"i could use some contributions to help this website survive!!!! You can contribute anything you want by changing the amount above. This website receives thousands of visits a day so if everyone contributed just a little. I am fighting both the good fight and my own health issues!So please contribute some green power via the pay pal link above"

I vote we take action. Action against this misguided activist you cannot see farther than his filthy, drug menacing "peace" pipe. I vote we challenge the use of this URL and use our adsense dollars to feed the needy with pies, not pot.

Who's with me?

Mrs Mac's daughter gets her license

2006-03-06T09:50:00.000+11:00

Beware, she is out there.

Pies and IT - the trend continues

2006-02-27T16:54:00.000+11:00

Attending a customer event of a major vendor today, I had the chance to wander about among the common folk.

As is usually the case, an array of food and drink was freely available, and I quick scanned what was on offer.

Quite to my surprise, I spied a selection of spinach and mushroom pies! I was impressed, this is not part of your regular customer food fanfare.

But once again, I did not have the time to sample these delights =(. I can only trust they were fully appreciated by those present.

But I felt this worth observing given the conspicuous rise of pies among the IT establishment.

Note: The vendor shall remain nameless. It takes more than free pies to get on my good side (although it does go some way toward it).

That's a nice pie!

2006-02-24T10:56:00.000+11:00

Seems that the bar has been raised for pie loving ploggers...

The Unidentified Pie ingredient Object (UPO)

2006-02-23T16:44:00.000+11:00

While much of this plog is dedicated to the praise, the taste, and the forbidden love between pie and beast one must address the UPO.

Have you ever bitten into a pie, chewed on its contents, and then chewed a bit more....knowing that what you are chewing on isn't supposed to be in your pie? I'd like to dub a them the Unidentified Pie ingredient Object or UPO for short.

I remember as a portly fellow in my youth, possibly around the age of 10, I bit into a pie and came across a clear, chewy substance covered in gravvy. Spincter or swine snout I presume. I also remember the brand was called "Aussie Pies". This wasn't my only encounter with a UPO from the same pastry fold. In my teens, I went through a stage of eating pies in a funny way. I was experimenting with pie by taking the top pastry layer off, eating it first, then the contents, and then the rest. That's right, while other kids were distracted by pot, butane, bulbs, and the science teacher who used to flash her pie, I was obsessed with the original beef pie.

I digress.

I pulled out what looked like a vein. Having just learnt about how female pies work in Science one of my friends suggested it was a follopian tube. It probably was, but from which animal was a mystery to us. So who were these "Aussie Pies" covering arseholes, lips, and labia with gravy and calling it a pie? I went to a respectable school....I'd hate to imagine what the kids at the State schools, the retarded schools, and old folks at the nursing homes were getting dished up...

Which brings me to my plog question. What is the worst UPO you've found in your pie?

Mrs Mac - there is no escape

2006-02-20T13:29:00.000+11:00

On the weekend I was passing through Richmond way or somewhere, and had just bought a Mrs Macs sausage roll with sauce from a service station.

As I was hooking into it outside the station, a Mrs Macs delivery truck drove right past me.

In light of my continued chance encounters with Mrs Macs army, I can come to no other conclusion than this:

I am being stalked by Mrs Mac.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!

Mrs Mac, be gone with you! You wicked, wicked woman.

Famous pies....

2006-02-17T12:49:00.000+11:00

From Anonymous: "Love is like a pie - give it away and you will be healthier for it."

but this got me thinking - are pies famous, in film, literature and the arts...

I recall - the four and twenty blackbirds got involved with pies and poetry. And there was little jack horner who sat there getting busy with his chrimbo special, but this seems to be from moralistic nursury rhyme era and not pop-culture or any of our own generational incons...

hmmm

A new plogger enters the fray

2006-02-14T16:20:00.000+11:00

Pie people, it is with pleasure that I announce that at this very moment, and with my guidance, The New Cankles aka Matty O is tucking into a Sleven cheese and bacon traveller pie.

While I believe our latest plogger will make a valuable addition to the team, I would like to stress that he is not a replacement for our beloved Cank, whose charms are many and varied. Rather, he is a new brother in the pie family. (Not a brother in the clergyman sense.)

EDIT
His comprehensive review follows:

General Info:
7-Eleven cheese and bacon "traveller" pie
$3.40 RRP, with 2 sachets of 20c tomato sauce

Basic Observations:
Plastic wrapped
Consumed 2 days before pie destroys world.

Bite 1:
Reviewer notices a robust, solid pastry, covered in melted something-or-other.
Tongue is attacked immediately by salty inner filling of indeterminate origin.
Pale coloured chunks sighted. Eyebrow raised in concern.
Tester unsure of whether or not to continue.

Bite 2:
Tester decides to take a hit for the team in the name of research and musters the fortitude to go in for a second, even larger bite.
Previously described pale chunk disappears in second bite, only to be replaced by more.
Texture best described as, “interesting”.
Pastry remains intact after bites, and 7-Eleven branded Masterfoods sauce does little to convince tester that he’s onto a good thing.

Bite 3:
Back for more.
Mouth is becoming numb to the excessive salt and tongue is recoiling in horror.
Pale chunks now dominate what could loosely be described as sauce.
First sighting of cheese-like substance. Could be anything, though, really.
Tester now realises that there was no ingredients list on the clear plastic packaging and fears for his safety.

Bite 4:
Tester soldiers on.
Got a big mouthful of the “cheese”.
Salt overload. Tester reminded of George Costanza, “this pretzel is making me thirsty”.
Tester calls for slurpee to help numb the pain. Slurpee fails to satisfy.

Bite 5:
Having survived this far, tester is now feeling invulnerable and goes in for a fifth bite.
Tester spots (for the first time) a chunk of what could actually turn out to be meat.
Tester extracts “meat” from pie and quickly sends to CSIRO for testing.
Having exhausted one package of “Squeeze-on” tomato sauce, tester cracks a second 20c packet and applies liberally to remainder of alleged pie.

Bite 6:
Tester delirious from excessive salt-induced dehydration.
Hallucinates a purple squid swimming in front of his monitor.
Desperate times, desperate measures. Bite number six is taken.
Bite 7:
Tester begins to see light at the end of the tunnel as pastry is almost gone.
Purple squid start drinking the slurpee.
More pale chunks spotted, but tester is unsure of anything he sees, touches or tastes right now. Body in revolt.

Bite 8:
The second last bite.
Taster is sensing victory over pastry and salt. There’s a little voice in the back of his head suggesting that the pie will have the last laugh, though.
Purple squid nod in agreement.

Bite 9:
Squid decide to swim in and snaffle the last mouthful, saving the reviewer from the abject horror that is the 7-Eleven Bacon and Cheese Pie.
Reviewer feels decidedly average, and wishes he was better prepared for the taste sensation.

Score:
2/10

Jesters take pies seriously

2006-02-10T11:15:00.000+11:00

Pacing the streets of North Sydney last night, I came across an interesting little eatery, with a bold tagline:

Serious about pies. I like it. Sounds like my kind of shop. Only problem was, I didn't have time to pop in.

Put this one down on your to-do list people. We have a visit to make.

Newsflash: Starbucks resells SL pies

2006-02-10T10:52:00.000+11:00

According to Judy at Bondi Junction Simmone Logue, Simmy has brought Starbacks on board in her pie distribution chain.

Obviously realising that her pies would be popular outside of Balmain and Bondi, she found the most common denominator in suburbs (outside of mcdonalds).

So there is FINALLY a legitimate reason to go to starbucks and enjoy the comfy chairs.

Mrs Macs online

2006-02-08T16:36:00.000+11:00

I have to hand it to Mrs Macs. I just checked out their website: mrsmacs.com.au -- and it is a veritable treasure trove of information.

There is even current news about the pies themselves:
http://www.mrsmacs.com.au/MediaCentre/

But if you think that boring, check this out: Meat Pie Trivia!

This info could be used to make the trivia game played on the inaugural pie-eating contest weekend.

All in all, quite interesting reading. Good to see an Aussie company leading the way in pies.

They will receive an e-mail from me shortly.

Hannah's, by day

2006-02-08T12:40:00.000+11:00

Wandering the streets of Pyrmont yesterday in search of new pies, I took the time to photograph this pie-eating landmark for our far-flung friends in Bondi and the US. I'm sure it warms the heart.

Ahh yes, no doubt it's been a long time since you've seen it. Business was brisk yesterday.

On a related note, I stopped into a shop just up the road from Hannah's late yesterday. It was the convenience store just down from the Futsal Colosseum. I was picking up some energy food before slugging it out, and what did I stumble across inside there but an oven full, full - I stress, of Mrs Macs pies.

I could not believe. Believe it, I could not. The woman is everywhere. And so are her pies.

This just adds to the impetus to find new pie frontiers, otherwise reviewing Mrs Macs all the time will be tedious. Surely there are other brands out there.

Note to self: Send that e-mail to Mrs Macs.

At long last...

2006-02-08T11:51:00.000+11:00

Ladies and gentlemen...

I give you...

The Online Pie Chart

(A work in progress.)

Wow, that HTML code monkeying for a certain business tech print title sure did come in handy.

Snickers pie

2006-02-06T15:19:00.000+11:00

Pie recipe for nuts
February 6, 2006 - 10:55AM

It used to be deep fried Mars bars, but now a celebrity chef has come up with a dish that's even worse for your health - Snickers pie.

A UK food watchdog says Antony Worrall Thompson's recipe for Snickers pie is one of the unhealthiest ever published, reports the UK's Daily Telegraph.

The Food Commission calculates that one slice of the pie made of the peanut cocolate bars contains more than 1,250 calories.

Five Snickers bars go into the pie, with mascarpone, eggs, sugar, soft cheese and puff pastry.
The commission found that one portion has the equivalent of 22 teaspoons of fat and 11 teaspoons of sugar.

The recipe, which appears on the BBC website, is featured in Food magazine, published by the Food Commission.

"We love a decent dessert as much as anyone, but surely this has to be one of the most unhealthy recipes ever published," the article alongside the recipe states.

Mr Worrall Thompson reportedly said the dish was intended to be a special treat for a children's party.

"On Saturday mornings we attract children to the program and from time to time you have to make them feel as though they are being looked after as well as the health police," he said.

"Kids have to be allowed to be kids from time to time. I think prohibition is when you start getting kids eating behind your back. It is better to give them a treat from time to time."

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I believe we should have a pie party and bake this delectable treat.

Moto party pies

2006-02-03T10:47:00.000+11:00

Ploggers, I am pleased to report that not only did the year's first vendor event feature an array of party pies, but these delicacies represented the SOLE foodstuff available on the night. That's right -- no chicken skewers, no samosas, none of those fiddly diddly oysters and prawns of yore. Just solid, no-nonsense steak and vegetable pies.

I recall eating one or two before the night became a whirlwind of champagne, dancing, chatting casually to Natalie Bassingthwaiteteeenttenetntnetnntntne and playing a rousing round of backgammon. I think it was backgammon. It may have been a game of goon laybacks. Similar rules.

I do hope that this trend of offering only pies at hip and happening launches continues throughout 2006. It could spawn a sub-division in our reviews: vendor party pies.

Ain't no pies in Malaysia

2006-02-02T14:47:00.000+11:00

And so I have returned from my pie fact-finding mission in Malaysia, or more specifically, Penang. High and low I searched this island for a shop that would give me what I craved, but it just seemed pie in the sky (for once, a bad thing).

Then on my last day, trekking through the steamy streets of the area known as Little India (for very good reason), I saw it. A typically run-down, shabby shop-front, but with a sign hanging out front proclaiming to sell, among other things, meat and vegetable pies! Surely this was it, the Malaysian experience I had been craving.

I entered the premises to find the Indian owners seated out the back of the shop, engaged in discussion. Not seeing any obvious pies in the shop windows, just cakes, I wandered up the back to them.

"Ah, excuse me, do you sell pies today?"

"Pies?" said the woman in her naturally strong Indian accent.

"Yeh, like meat, and vegetable pies?" I replied.

"No, we only sell cakes," came the instant retort.

"Then why do you have it on your bloody sign, woman!" (I wish I had said this bit, instead of my sheepish "Oh ok").

And so I left the shop, and indeed Penang, pie-less. A solitary pie I did not find.

What does this mean for the people of Malaysia? How can they go on without pies? Buggered if I know. And so I give Penang, and, what the hell, all of Malaysia, the thumbs down.

Postscript

I would like to call on my Malaysian compatriot, Miss A&R, to offer her findings of the pie-barren landscape of this sorry country.

However I must warn you all to take her advice on pies with a grain of meat.

This is the woman that before sitting next to me on the flight over told me in no uncertain terms "Now you can't talk about pies!".

HP sauce? um.

2006-01-31T14:17:00.000+11:00

Came across this club, Im not sure Id want to be a member, or even taste any of its pies, however, in the context of some of the previous postings, it does make you wonder what exactly this club is dealing in...?

and it does give a new meaning to HP sauce no?
(see post: when is a pie not a vagina?)

Thinking of pie

2006-01-25T00:24:00.000+11:00

Before leaving for the land of Apple pie a few ploggers (pie bloggers, geddit?) got together for a few cocktails.

What is this plogger thinking of?

I think this deserves a caption contest. The winner gets a free pie!

Welcome

2006-01-23T14:07:00.000+11:00

"Mmmm Aarghm Mnyumyumyum.
My first pie as an Australian citizen!"

Welcome - Love the hat.

Mrs Macs everywhere

2006-01-23T10:38:00.000+11:00

Was on school camp on the weekend at a remote location inland of Wyong. This was a place so segregated from modern society, there was little mobile phone coverage (which was actually quite nice for a change, but I digress).

After a hard day's slog brainstorming new ideas that will lead us into The Golden Age of Publishing, our faithful troops launched an assault on the local pub.

But imagine my surprise when I walked up to the bar to see an oven to the side with one Mrs Macs Pie sitting inside! Even in rural areas of the north coast is there no escape from Mrs Macs' reach. She truly has a wide-reaching empire.

The fact that there was only one left also leads me to infer that Dooralong may be one of the heartlands for Mrs Macs' success.

As you would expect, I did intend to purchase the remaining pie and review it there and then, but I'm afraid the beers, the jukebox, and general tomfoolery got the better of me.

Homer Simpson is 'Pie Man'!

2006-01-19T09:06:00.000+11:00

Flicking through the channels last night, what did I happen across but the end of that much-cherished Simpsons episode, 'Pie Man'.

What a gem. And I can't help but think there is a Channel 10 programmer (they're based in Pyrmont, you know) who sensed change in the local area and timed the showing of this episode to coincide with our conquest.

Personally, my favourite bit of the Pie Man episode was where Homer reluctantly pies the little girl scout. Oh I'm cruel. But pieing the Dalai Lama would have been funnier (sorry Renai).

If we were to hold a pie-eating contest, I think the male contestants should partake dressed as Pie-man. It would only be fitting.

The sauce of the issue

2006-01-17T17:05:00.000+11:00

To return to the Sauce debate:

Some time ago, before all of this pie business, I had an idea. All I wanted was the option to get sauce into my sausage roll. (I dont eat sauce on pies). For sausage rolls,I like it in them, not on them.

So I decided to see if anything could be achieved by correspondence with a sauce manufacturer to see if they would consider it. see below.
I think I made some good inroads...

I have rearranged this so you can read top to bottom.

-----Original Message-----
From: Gomer Piel (Identity ammended to protect the innocent)
Sent: Thursday, 20 August 2005 2:40 PM
To: Leanne Jaskiewicz
Subject: Rosella Feedback

Hello,
I have a suggestion regarding the small portion packets of sauce/mayonnaise that you will typically buy with a pie or chips etc. esp at places like thefootball/711 etc.
The squeezable pack is handy enough for chips or anything that you need to put sauce ON to, but with the average pie/pasty or sausage roll, most eaters would generally like the option of putting sauce IN to the pie.
Historically most pie shops had a sauce bottle with a nozzle so that the pie crust can be pierced if desired.
It is extremely frustrating to have to eat a pie with sauce only on top. It is always depressing to find a pie shop that sells sauce portions because of this--irrespective of any sanitary advantage it obviously offers.
Having noticed that many of the soy sauce portions offered by take-away sushi bars around town have little fish-type soy packets with a nozzle that would be perfect for poking into a pie or pasty, it seems that it is quite plausible that something similar could be manufactured for the tomato sauce/mustard line of things.
In fact, i think it is amazing that this hasnt been done already.

Regards,
Gomer Piel (name removed)

From: Leanne Jaskiewicz [mailto:ljaskiewicz@stalex.com.au]
Sent: Thursday, 25 August 2005 10:09 AM
To: Gomer Piel (identiy surpressed)
Subject: Rosella Feedback

Dear Gomer (name changed cos im sneaky),

Thank you very much for your interest in Stuart Alexander, and in particular, the Rosella brand. We appreciate the effort and time you have taken to forward us your thoughts and suggestions.

Kind Regards,

Leanne Jaskiewicz
Assistant Brand Manager
Stuart Alexander
P 02 9697 6700 | F 02 9662 1596
E ljaskiewicz@stalex.com.au
62 Rosebery Ave | Rosebery | NSW 2018 | Australia www.stuartalexander.com.au

-----Original Message-----
From: Gomer Piel (nope.. no hints here)
Sent: Thursday, 25 August 2005 10:20 AM
To: Leanne Jaskiewicz
Subject: RE: Rosella Feedback

Hi Leanne,

You're welcome. I hope they are useful.

Is there any likelihood of something being developed along those lines or can you suggest if something is already in progress?

Im curious to know if this is something that might realistically happen.

There are many pie eaters here at work who are curious to know what the sauce industry is doing to best suit our needs.

:)

Regards
Gomer (haha)

-----Original Message-----
From: Leanne Jaskiewicz [mailto:ljaskiewicz@stalex.com.au]
Sent: Thursday, 25 August 2005 11:57 AM
To: Gomer Piel (Im all over this..)
Subject: RE: Rosella Feedback

Hi Gomer (that what she calls me),

At this point, there are no plans for any such packaging for the Rosella Tomato Sauce, but that's not to say that such an idea isn't being developed by another tomato sauce brand. You could probably try asking another brand and see if you have any luck there.

Regards,
Leanne

-----Original Message-----
From: Gomer Piel (nearly missed this one)
Sent: Thursday, 25 August 2005 12:41 PM
To: 'Leanne Jaskiewicz'
Subject: RE: Rosella Feedback

Hi Leanne,

Thanks for the feedback. I have already passed similar comments to some other brands and am awaiting their comments, so hopefully someone is addressing this in some way.

In any case, I am hopeful that in the future this may be undertaken by Rosella - one of my preferred sauce brands.

I would be grateful if you passed on my suggestions to the relevant people in your business so that this might be considered for the future.

Additionally I have done some web-research and have come across some blogs which contain comments that also make mention of their frustration with the design of sauce portions.

Please keep me informed of any developments that might occur in this regard.

Regards,
Gomer.............................................................

Stirring the pot

2006-01-16T16:37:00.000+11:00

With people getting a bit emotional over the apparent lack of meat pies available to our American comrades (Cankles was crying before...he seems OK now), I thought I'd make a semantic clarification to ease the anguish.

The culinary delight we know as the meat pie is often referred to in the US as a "pot pie". The following excerpt from everyone's favourite knowledge booster, Wikipedia, may enlighten somewhat:

Pot pie
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.

A pot pie is a type of baked savory pie with a bottom and top (or just top) covered in flakey crusts and baked in its own pie tin. This is a recently modern advancement of the pasty which often required one to discard the crust as it was much harder than the rest of the pastry.

Simple Facts
Frozen food pot pies are often sold in small aluminum or paper pie plates and may be baked or microwaved. Most pot pies are single serving, and contain some sort of meat and vegetable stew. Many relatively small pot pies contain over one thousand calories and one thousand milligrams of sodium.

Ingredients
Although there are many different kinds of pot pies, chicken, turkey, and beef are the most popular. Chicken pot pies contain a gravy-like sauce with vegetables such as potatoes, peas, carrots, broccoli (sometimes), corn, and, of course, chicken. Turkey pot pies have most of the above, except they have turkey instead of chicken. Beef pot pies are different, though. They have most of the items found in a beef stew, such as a beef flavored gravy rather than a gravy-like sauce, potatoes, peas, corn, and carrots.

Pot pies come in different sizes. They can be individual size, or they can be multiple servings. Most frozen pot pies are individual, though.

Variations
In the Pennsylvania Dutch region it is not served in a pie form at all, but more of a stew form. It usually a combination of chicken, ham or beef, noodles (from scratch) made from a basic pie crust recipe, potatoes, and a healthy stock of onion, celery, and parsley. Boullion is used to get more of a flavor, but if done right it's not needed.

Pies in the States

2006-01-16T15:20:00.000+11:00

Browsing the sports pages, I read with interest this observation on the AFL exhibition match played in the US:

"The crowd was largely filled with expatriate Australians who were willing to pay $A10 for a meat pie - a food item normally hard to find in the US - and $A8 for a Foster's.

"A line of almost 200 people was formed early in the day at one food vendor in the hope of scoring a pie and before half-time most of the pies were sold out."

www.smh.com.au/news/afl/roos-hammer-swans-in-la-exhibition/2006/01/16/1137259977017.html

God bless these Aussies. Their love of pie knows no bounds.

I find the proposition that pies are hard to find in the US interesting. This is a thesis I would like to challenge.

And as luck would have it, I believe a certain red-headed pie eater will soon be deployed on a US fact-finding mission to uncover the truth about pies.

No doubt he'll bring us reports from overseas on the pie-eating (or pie-loathing?) culture of the US.

Good luck, young lad, and may the pies be in you.

Crystal ball

2006-01-16T11:20:00.000+11:00

Ladies and gentlemen,

I have heard whisperings of a pie eating contest. I must say, I would ask that you exercise caution in planning this endeavour. Sure, it's all fun and games now, but just take a look at your future:

FAST EATING – Sandra Zakai of Sherman Oaks won first place in the 18 and older division of the Millie’s Restaurant & Bakery Pie Eating Contest held Sept. 17 at the L.A. County Fair. In two minutes Zakai was able to eat more of her pie than any other competitor, finishing the entire pie.

Now, I ask of you: Do you want to live in the infamy of being a shameless glutton, with a face besmeared with suspicious-looking cream and a chubby-fingered hand holding up a blue ribbon that wouldn't look out of place on a prize heifer at the Easter Show?

A little dignity, please.

The Last Pie

2006-01-13T09:40:00.001+11:00

Piefriends... a moment to cherish.

I was out last night with apple and rhubarb and we got a bit peckish after the pub closed. Now there is a sweet little bakery on the corner, and the smells of fresh baking bread and pies is enough to turn even a dietician weak at the knees.

We hussled in only to find one pie left - an all-day-in-the-warmer, curried pie.

And dear freinds, far from being the dried up runt that you might expect after 16 hours in a shop window, it was salvation itself... no napkins required.

We documented this gem, so i present to you A&R and her curried wonder....
review to follow.

Comments and housekeeping

2006-01-12T15:24:00.000+11:00

Lovers of all things pie,
I have changed it so everyone and anyone can post a comment on this blog.

Also, it seems we are starting to make a killing on this blog by putting ads through adsense. So far we've got USD 28 cents in the bank. While hardly not enough to buy a sachett of sauce for a bad pie (only bad pies have sauce, right?) be a sport and tell your friends, link the site, and check out the ads. The more clicks, links, and hits the more $$.

The question is:

"What do we do with this money if we reach USD $100 dollars?"

I'd like to suggest a pie eating contest...

Sharing the pies

2006-01-12T09:45:00.000+11:00

Dear pieoneers,

I feel it is time to address an issue on the future of this blog that I have been mulling for some time.

Should we open up access to allow those from outside our little pie sphere to post comments? I believe we may be doing our cause an injustice, not to mention depriving ourselves of some humour injections, by keeping this wonderful new media conversation to ourselves.

As time goes by I believe this blog will attract more and more converts, and it'd be great to interact with fellow pie-eaters from around the world.

The approving of comments could be done by any of us.

What are your thoughts?

When is a pie not a vagina?

2006-01-10T16:22:00.000+11:00

Reading the hip, on-edge dictionary that is Urban Dictionary I was intrieged to see what "pie" produced. It seems a pie is not always a baked good that can best be found in small country towns and back streets of major cities. Here are some new meanings to pie:

1. A female, or female sex organ, as in "pussy pie". Used mainly for a larger or puffy genital region.
Dude let's go get us some pie. and
dont be shy... show us ya pie!
Oh dude! Look at the pie on her!

2. A word that can be used to answer any question known to man, and can be an excuse if you do not know the answer to the question.
What's the answer to number 1?
uhh . . . pie?

3. A random word to shout for no particular reason at all. Great in moments of silence.
PIE!!!

4. A kilo of cocaine. Terminology used by crack addicts or drug dealers.
20g fo' that pie

5. A pie is someone who eats lots (normally junk)or a fat person
Came about when a study was released stating that some mince pies have a golfball of fat in them- you eat a lot of pies, you get fat. therefore eating mince pies was assioateed with being fat then fat with eating pies then being a pie!
"Whoa, look at all the food she's brought- what a pie!"

6. Pizza
I'll have a slice of cheese pie

So who ate all the pies in space?

2006-01-10T13:13:00.000+11:00

An interesting diversion - not expressedly Pie orientated. But the concept of Pies in Space does have a decided charm to it.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,3-1398386,00.html

and leads in all sorts of directions...
Satellite Pies.
Space Pies
Moon Pies.
hubble pies
explorer pies
challenger Pies
Dehydrated pies
Cosmopies
pie rentry
Ground control to major Pie
Starpies
The Empier strikes back
jedpies
Pie trek
Pie walks
astropies (not apostropies)
Interpielactic
the milky pie
Piestalation
Pie light Pie bright
teh man in the pie
eclipse of the pie
a pielor eclipse
um.....

The Pie in the Sky awards

2006-01-10T10:34:00.000+11:00

Those pie-eating wannabes over at ASIC have gone too far.

Not satisfied with their menial little day job, these try-to-be-pie mugs have announced their 'Pie In The Sky' awards for 2006. What's worse, they've given it the acronym - The 'PITS'.

See link, and release extract below:

Tuesday 10 January 2006

06-004

Astronomical returns or pie in the sky?

Do you want a return of 5 per cent every week on your money? Why not turn $10,000 into $124,600 in a single year by trading currency and US Treasury bonds, with your capital guaranteed by the 'International Investment and Securities Commission'?

Alternatively, for a handling fee (and other charges to be revealed later) you can collect your winnings from a lottery supposedly set up under the will of the late Princess Diana.

blah, blah, blah....

If only these offers came true. But generally they don't. That's why they've made the 2006 ASIC 'Pie In The Sky' awards (The PITS).

‘ASIC announces the Pie In The Sky awards once a year for the most outrageous financial scheme that's too good to be true,’ Acting ASIC Executive Director of Consumer Protection, Ms Delia Rickard, said.

www.fido.asic.gov.au/fido/fido.nsf/byheadline/Pie+In+The+Sky+Awards+?openDocument

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I'm insulted. Never has my name been used in this way. If these finance mugs think they can get in on our little pie-eating game, they have another think coming.

I don't want my good name tarnished by these cardigan-wearing bastards.

I think there is a salient point in all this though folks. Like any promising idea, people will try and use a name for their own purposes and political agendas. We cannot let this happen.

The good name of pies must remain untarnished.

Onwards, pie-eating soldiers.

Who is Simmone Logue?

2006-01-06T14:43:00.000+11:00

Surely she is a wanted woman. Who wouldn't want to snag the person who creates such great pies.

Having previously sampled a SL sausage roll that was one of the best I had ever consumed, I thought it was time to try a pie -- the pumpkin, lentil, potato, spinach and fetta pie. No I am not one of those vegie-hippy-I-only-eat-fish freaks but I do feel guilty eating a pie -- too many magazines have told me how evil they are -- so I felt a vegetable one was only half bad, and wouldn't harm my CSIRO Wellbeing diet.

How did the pie stack up? See below for the results.

Interoperability: There were many ingredients in this pie which made me nervous, but all of the flavours melded together nicely. It was mainly pumpkin; as for the lentils, thankfully they were barely noticeable, I think they were just there to add something different to the consistency (like seriously, do people actually like lentils?); just the right amount of soft-but-not-too-soft potato chunks. The only let down was the spinach and fetta content, which was minimal. There were only a few strips of spinach, and it wasn't until I was two thirds of the way through that the fetta turned up. 3.5 stars.

Futureproofing: Flaky pastry on top, crispy edges, and thick soft pastry on the bottom - does it come any better? This pie was chock-a-block full of fillings and the bottom didn't crack once. No fear of spillage. 5 stars.

ROI: $5 is at the top end for a pie but you are getting top quality and the size is bigger than the norm. Comes with a free container of tomato sauce -- and quite unnecessarily too, a pie full of these flavours does not need sauce. 4 stars

Service: Only needed one serviette afterwards, and no maintenance needed while consuming. The greasy feeling on my fingers afterwards was minimal and the fact that I wasn't coverage in pastry flakes was a bonus. 5 stars.

Overall: Top quality, hard to beat as far as non-meat pies go. 4 stars.

Surpies!

2006-01-05T13:51:00.000+11:00

Where: my loungeroom coffee table
Brand: Mrs Macs - not a good start, but there it was, winking at me. and no one around to notice.
Cost: Free - a present from my housemate - left ready on a plate all warm and toasty.
Pastry: 6/10 - it did have pastry.
size: 7/10 - it was one of the big pie variety.
Overall Tastiness: 5/10 - this was only enabled by a fiesty drunken hunger.... and lots of HP sauce, and the fact that it was free. Free things do taste better.
Sauce: BYO - luckily i was in my loungeroom and like any good DIYpie, I am armed to the teeth with condiments ready to salvage even the most average of production line pies.
Overall rating: 6/10 - this was improved dramatically by the knowledge that i was in my own home, watching my own TV. I was deligted to employ the use of a plate, knife and fork, which does bring a rather more sophisticated "dinnertime" atmposphere to the pie which traditionally would be eaten from one hand or the other whilst balancing napkins and a drink on your knee.
Value Ratio: this would have been rendered off the scale. The formula assumes that the pie will have some sort of cost and free does not exist. for a pie worth eating will have a value. However in the interested of keeping peace amongst pielovers, we should all accept that a free pie is a pie of the highest value and cannot actually exist in any real comparitive context.
A pie, to be considered in a comparitive way, and with consideration of value must be assigned a "cost value" by its distributor. Thus the pie is give a criteria against which it can be measured. To remove the cost is to remove a significant criteria and render the science behind the method, inconsolable.

Pie porn

2006-01-05T13:42:00.000+11:00

Pie bloggers, feast your eyes on this fresh hot sweetie. Can't you just hear the impassioned, lustful plea, "Eat me"?

It has occurred to me that as Australians, you are all missing out on the most pie-redolent holiday: Thanksgiving. This "Sorry we killed you, ~~Indians~~ Native Americans!"-themed event often features multiple pie varieties, including pumpkin, sweet potato, chocolate, and occasionally, savoury varieties.

If you are ever in the United States during late November, I recommend you make friends quick-smart with a Pilgrim-esque WASP family so that you may ingratiate yourself into their household and feast upon their piely bounty.

Festive pies

2006-01-05T12:08:00.000+11:00

Having finally recovered my wits, dignity and Blogger password after a heinously overindulgent holiday season, I would like to open the forum to the subject of mince pies. For so long I was ignorant to the charms of this festive confection. I confess that for several years, I even believed that the "mince" of the moniker referred to beef. How misguided I was in my youth. I chuckle about it now.

I'm pleased to report that, during a belated Christmas celebration at the Palm Beach abode (approximately 50m from the Lleyton and Bec Love Nest) of my extended family, I was able to sample a truly divine mince pie. I am uncertain as to the manufacturer, but due to my uncle's wealth and refined gastronomic preferences, I believe the batch was acquired from the David Jones Food Hall.

The first thing that struck me about the pie was that, unlike its savoury brethren, it is a pastry best enjoyed at room temperature. Warming or cooling a mince pie results in a lamentable alteration to the viscosity of the filling, which detracts from the overall eating experience.

Although the pie was certainly rich and infused with a pleasingly sweet liquer -- exact variety unknown -- the sweetness was not cloying, as you tend to find in cheaper mince pies. The pastry was firm, and yet it yielded easily to the most gentle of bites: a conundrum that is but one facet of the pie's charms.

The size of the pie -- best described as lying in the middle of the party-pie-to-meat-pie spectrum -- had the dual advantage of being large enough to satisfy a lingering post-lunch hunger, and small enough to allow me to pretend I was a giant.

Overall, a very fulfilling experience.

Where: Most likely David Jones Food Hall
Cost: No financial cost; cost to waistline still undetermined
Pastry: 8/10
Size: 9/10
Overall Tastiness: 8/10
Sauce: No condiments needed for this self-contained wonder
Overall rating: 8.25/10

The Not-o-soggy

2005-12-23T10:01:00.000+11:00

see http://www.abc.net.au/newinventors/txt/s1155576.htm

Julio Antonio Gomez, is undoubtedly a contender for "Pie Man". Gomez has taken on the long troubling issue of soggy pastry when microwaving your pie.

Many would say "just dont do it" but pie lover Gomez likes to enjoy a speedy pie and has applied his engineering background to come up with a device, he originally named the Not-o-soggy.

The not-o-soggy won a silver medal at the Geneva International Exhibition of Inventions in 1996. Truly a sign that there are pie lovers prepared to vote with their fat arms and put their pudgy hand up for an invention that truly represents a leap forward in the DIY pie heating market.

Apparently it is also useful for pizzas - but this is of little concern.

Pie man, we solute you

2005-12-21T12:09:00.000+11:00

Every once in a while an individual comes along to make a difference in the world. Whether it be Mother Teresa to help those in poverty, AB who started Australia's rise to dominance in world cricket, or Osama bin laden for putting the T in terror and the catylst to bring about police state laws around the world.

It's with a tear in my eye I blog that Sgt. Linn Windle, known by locals in Branson Missouri as "The Pie Man", will retire at the end of the year.

For those not familiar with the Pie Man he has been a local highway patrol officer at Branson for 27 years and baked more than 1,200 pies. He is most famously known for his Oatmeal crumb apple, strawberry rhubarb, and gooseberry — "for the natives".

More importantly all pies baked in his spare time have been given free to charities, raising over $7000 dollars. While reflecting the Christmas season Windle's words of wisdom should be spread far and wide:

"My grandmother told me a person is rich if they have two things: their health and their family."

By that analogy, nice work on keeping people poor Mr Windle. Mr.Windle, Lord, Mr.Windel.

Quick stats:
1,200 - Number of pies Linn Windle has baked in past five years

$600 - Top bid for a pecan pie

7,200 - Number of cookies Windle has baked so far this holiday season

http://www.news-leader.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20051220/NEWS/512200360

We will remember

2005-12-20T16:15:00.000+11:00

Folks,
While the mince pie season falls upon us let us not forget those who have fallen in the line of duty to deliver an early death through diabetes, obesity and heart disease with butter-fuelled pastry. Catastrophe hit this week in the sleepy town of Julian in the United States this week where it seems the local pie house, presumably the apple variety, was burnt to the ground:

JULIAN – Firefighters were putting out a small electrical fire that broke out Friday morning at a popular eatery and tourist spot in downtown Julian, authorities said.

The fire was reported at Mom's Pie House on Main Street near B Street around 10:44 a.m., a fire dispatcher said.

Fire crews are still at the restaurant and working to extinguish the blaze, she said. Main Street is closed between Washington and B streets.

http://www.signonsandiego.com/news/metro/20051216-1126-bn16pie.html

Party pie review - Sargents

2005-12-20T13:31:00.000+11:00

Where: Coles (new world)
Cost: $N/A
Pastry: 3/10
size: 5/10
Overall Tastiness: 4/10
Sauce: 0/10
Overall rating: 4/10
Value Ratio: N/A

Having bought the 16 pack of pastry meat one shopping expedition the poor souls have been neglected for a few months in the freezer. Alas last week, after a boozy session, my enebriated self slowly unpacked the solid mass for quick and greasy consumption.

Not knowing exactly how the oven worked, 5 party pies were thrown into the microwave and put on high for 2 minutes--which is enough to cook the Salminela out of Pope John Paul himself. Sauceless, the pies were presented on a white dinner plate with little options available to garnesh.

Though nuked in the Microwave the pies were quite tasty with a strong taste of gravy and bits of beef. What part of animal was included in the pie is unclear but the chewiness indicated rump, sphincter, or follopian tube. Possibly all three.

While you won't see this pie on your gourmet travels out in country Australia, you will see these pocket rockets being readily consumed in the privacy of ones home as a quick delivery for soaking up licqour. While the title says party, its not exactly the pie you want to be having in a social environment, it is a pie to be enjoyed between the sheets by oneself.

Truly a pie for the bachelors out there.

From Melbourne, with pies

2005-12-20T12:37:00.000+11:00

Was in Melbourne on the weekend, and before coming home, was prowling Melbourne airport's food court for something that could cure my blasted cold. Browsing the various rip-off cafes and eateries, what did I happen across but a Mrs Macs pie in one of the cafes! I could not believe it.

This got me thinking about the retail reach of various pie producers. Mrs Macs obviously has extensive reach beyond your average franchise agreements. But the fact that the company with the cheapest pie on record has managed a deal with a pricey little eatery in Melbourne airport calls for concern. Is the Australian pie industry falling victim to Mrs Macs wide-reaching distribution network? Is there a Mrs Macs monopoly? These are questions I will endeavour to answer next year.

However the situation illustrated another challenge of being a fully-fledged pie-reviewer. Even though my aching body cried out for pie, I knew it was not in the best interests of the pie chart to review this under the influence of Melbourne weather. Any such review could have unfairly tarnished the good name of Mrs Macs, and brought discredit on our humble pie-eating community. Thus, I abstained.

Let this be a lesson to you all. Discipline folks, it's all about discipline.

Roll Review I

2005-12-20T12:33:00.000+11:00

Where: tango
Cost: $2.50

Pastry: 1/10
Length: 6/10
Overall Tastiness: 4/10
Sauce: 0/10
Overall rating: 3.6/10
Value Ratio: 1.44

Comments:
Considering the location of tango and size of this roll, there was enormous potential to create the pre-eminent SR experience. All hopes were dashed however when the tasty looking morsel was inserted into a "microwave", the evil machine nuked it completely leaving a half-cooked centre with a sloppy and dissatisfying pastry. This is a point that no pie-related foodstuff can ever hope to recover from; more so when there are no condiments to cover up these conspicuous faults.

A man after my own heart

2005-12-17T09:26:00.000+11:00

We can all learn from this guy...

You see this pie, this guy's in love with you

By Neil Tweedie in Wigan, England
December 17, 2005

THE question "who ate all the pies?" need never be asked when Anthony "The Anaconda" Danson is in the room. Put a pie in front of him and it will enjoy a life expectancy of seconds.

www.smh.com.au/news/unusual-tales/you-see-this-pie-this-guys-in-love-with-you/2005/12/16/1134703607554.html

Random acts of pieness

2005-12-15T09:41:00.000+11:00

It has to be said, today is a great day. I was piening for a new direction and heavens to betsy, you wont believe what i found.

A gift from the pie fairy.

yes, this morning i found on my desk a neatly wrapped apple crumble pie for one. What delight! and the note was oh so mysterious - simply signed love - pie fairy.

You can be certain it was a fairy because it was a fruity pie. None of the meat and gristle weve been concentrating on so far. that would have bee a pie troll or pie dwarf.

So.. just as things were looking tired.. a whole new real of pies is opened to us. Be sure. this will rock the pie chart to its foundation for the question we must all now face.. is can a sweet pie be pitted against savoury?

Inserting the pie chart

2005-12-15T09:23:00.000+11:00

Pie lovers,
Yesterday I had spent about 20 minutes trying to export an excel file to xml>Web to appear in blogger. I believe blogger does not support the functionality we need, or if it does it will break the look and feel of the blog.

I'll look at it again later today, but Mr. BlogTech have you got any tricks up your sleeve--you know something you've cooked up earlier that we could dish up?

What we could do is export certain stats.

One Million Aussie Pies

2005-12-14T16:49:00.000+11:00

Nerding this place up a bit, but feast your eyes on this beauty!

When all is propitious, pida contemplates pi with pie.

Legal obligations

2005-12-14T10:07:00.000+11:00

Pie bloggers,
before we get started on our pie-venture I thought it might be worthy to set out some ground rules and remember our legal obligations.

The first rule of pie club is we should not use real names. We have respectable jobs to keep and besides if someone finds out our real identities we could be a target of retribution from Mrs Mac and her posse. (or worse a PR company for bad lunches)

Before I get started on pie and food related reviews let me first draw your attention to some legal house cleaning. I can, nor you can afford a lawsuit so remember kids no defamation. If you are looking for a place to find out about bloggers and lawsuits I'd recommend the following site for reference:
http://www.medialaw.org/Template.cfm?Section=Home&Template=/ContentManagement/ContentDisplay.cfm&ContentID=3512

Now to organise the format of pie-blogs. How do we want to make this work? Do we post our reviews with pictures? Do we have topics? The floor is open for discussion knights of the pie table.

Community treatment of pie

2005-12-13T17:06:00.000+11:00

I'd like to take this brief opportunity to have a rant about the treatment of some pies in our community. Time and time again, I enter small supermarkets or milk bars and see pies left out in the cold. Where is the respect for this Aussie institution? It's just not cricket.

Often I see pies sitting in a pathetic excuse for an oven, without even so much as a jumper to keep them warm. This, I believe, amounts to neglect.

So the next time you see a poorly-treated pie, go and put it out of its misery. It'll be the best four bucks you ever spent.

Peace be with you.

Pie links, pielists and pieping hot pie fun

2005-12-13T15:51:00.000+11:00

1. ) http://omgwtf.superlime.com/pie.swf

First post

2005-12-13T15:38:00.000+11:00

For all things related to pies.

Blog away.